Cave News

Frustrated taxi driver

A cab driver picked up a nun. When the driver couldn’t stop staring at her, she asked him why he was staring. The driver replied, “I have a question to ask but I don’t want to offend you”. The nun said, "My dear young man, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could
say or ask that I would find offensive."

The driver said, “Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me. The nun replied, "Well, let's see what we can do about that - first you have to be single and second you must be Catholic." The cab driver became very excited and said, "Yes, I am single and I'm Catholic too!” The nun said, "OK, pull into the next alley" The driver pulled into the alley and the nun fulfilled his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush.

When they got back on the road, the cab driver started crying. "My dear young man”, said the nun, “why are you crying?" "Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied. I must confess, I'm married and I am not a Catholic. The nun said, "That's OK, my name is Kevin and I'm on my way to a Halloween party."

The magic of botox

Click here to see the magic of botox.

Somehow election day and Halloween seem to go together more this time than ever before!

Zipit wireless messanger

The new K-Byte Zipit Wireless Instant Messenger devices are available in six different colors for just $90 each. This could be for you if your idea of instant messaging is instant. Not when someone else finished a game so you have access to the computer.

Hot new colors
teens are the target

The Zipit Instant Messenger is a portable device that connects automatically to any 802.11 wireless network. It has a Buddy Button for locating online friends and allows you to take part in multiple, concurrent conversations. Click here for more information.

NY Times: Russia moved missing munitions

Did Russia really move the missing munitions? Pentagon is in process of declassifying satellite photos that may settle the issue. Photos should be released Friday morning. More info here and here.

Iraq munitions backlash

The polls right now seem to reflect the rejection (and maybe some backlash from) the Iraq munitions story that Kerry is stubbornly clinging to. At best the Iraq munitions is a non-story. At worst it is a fabrication that Kerry is using in an attempt to damage the President and defame our troops. More on this non-story on a new Washington Post article found here.

Bush still looks good in the polls

Things are looking pretty good for Bush's chances on election night with Kerry having to spend time defending traditional “blue” states that Gore won in 2000.

The polls right now seem to reflect the rejection (and maybe some backlash from) the fake Iraq munitions story Kerry is stubbornly clinging to. Come to think of it, why not. What else can he do that has a chance this late? Kerry is “pulling out all the stops”.

Did Sen. Biden teach John Kerry to plagerize?

An article in the New York Sun this morning states, “11 passages in Senator Kerry's published writings…appear to have been taken from other works without attribution, though experts disagree about whether the copying should be considered plagiarism”.

The article goes on to say that six of the passages were from John Kerry’s 1997 book, "The New War: The Web of Crime That Threatens America's National Security." All of these six passages “bear some similarity to news accounts that preceded publication of the book”.

The second to the last paragraph in the article has this: “Oddly, one of Mr. Kerry's closest advisers in his current campaign for the White House, John Sasso, played a key role in exposing one of America's most renowned cases of political plagiarism. In 1987, Senator Biden withdrew from the Democratic presidential primary after it was disclosed that large portions of his closing statement at a debate were nearly identical to portions of speeches delivered earlier by a leader of Britain's Labour Party.”

One wonders if Senator Biden taught Senator Kerry how to plagiarize. If so, maybe the student will have a place for the teacher in a Kerry administration.

Bloopers

This announcement was found in a Church bulletin: "There will be prayer and medication after the pot luck dinner today."

Another Church Bulletin announcement, not properly proof read, stated "The Choir Director has asked for anyone who enjoys sinning, please meet in the Church basement on Wednesday night at 8 PM".

An announcement from the pulpit, "We need to take up a collection for the new carpet. Anyone who wants to do something on the carpet, please come forward and do so now".

Inside the candidates

Electric accordion w/synthesizer

This cool looking squeeze box has a built in loudspeaker and amplifier. It has a synthesizer that can emulate organ and flute sounds. For jamming indoors it has a headphone out feature.